After
fully reading chapter 4 a few times, I think the most interesting, and probably
most important piece of information is the I-statements. The textbook’s authors
define I-statements as one of the most important skills in conflict that
“personalize the conflict by owning up to our feelings rather than to make them
the responsibility of the other person”. It’s a very simple tool to use in a
conflict, you simply say everything with “I”, such as “I feel…”, “I think…”, “I
would like…”, etc. It takes the blame and pressure for more problems out of the
other person and gives off a calming vibe. If these I-statements are used when
two people are trying to sort out or resolve a problem, it won’t take very
long. Not only do these I-statements set a calming vibe, but they also show
that you care about resolving a conflict because you are not putting blame on
the other person.
Hey,
ReplyDeleteOnce again, just letting you know that you are doing such a great job on your posts. I also thought the most interesting thing about chapter 4 was the use of “I” statements. As you stated using “I” statements “personalize the conflict by owning up to our feelings rather than to make them the responsibility of the other person”. I feel that this is extremely important because it tells the other person how you feel. However, using “you” statements can make the other individual feel like they are being attacked, and this can make conflict work. Therefore, using “I” statements is important to use when there is conflict.
Hi,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed reading your post. The I-statement was one thing that really stuck out to me as well and I thought it was something that was important and everyone should know about. You did a great job summarizing what it is. It does make it easier to not but all the blame on others and to just say things using “I” and then what you think, instead of say “You” and making a statement. It is a simple tool to use, but it can be hard for some people to do. You have to definitely think before you speak when using I-statements. Great post, keep up the good work.
I really like your topic of choice! I think I-statements are very important. People can become very defensive when you start saying things like "You make me feel..." or "You did this..." because it definitely creates this concept of blame and puts all the fault on them. If we simply state how certain things make us feel then it helps to alleviate some of the tension in the conflict and create a better understanding of the situation. You statements are like ticking time bombs for people who are readily defensive and argumentative. Nice post!
ReplyDelete